There is so much information out there regarding sex, it will make your head spin just trying to figure out some of it. This is because sex, and any topic related to it, is seldom discussed in public, despite the fact that it is part of adult life. The misconceptions regarding sex sometimes border on downright crazy, which makes it essential for people to have the right information. Here, we are going into the common sexual myths and misconceptions, and clarify on them as needed.
Let’s start with probably the most common misconception young people all over the world have probably heard: Everybody is doing it.
This can’t be further from the truth. For young people, don’t believe everything you hear from friends, probably as a result of peer pressure. Looking at the statistics, most teenagers wait until they are 18 and older to have sex. Further, only about 18% of teenagers have tried sex under that age. People will lie and exaggerate, talk up a good game when it comes to sex. In the end, do what is best for you. Might sound like a cliché, but it will be for the best.
Myth: The movies and TV programs portray sex as it really is
The fact is a big NO. See, those sexual scenes in the movies are ramped up and specifically made for entertainment, nothing else. Such scenes are designed to offer us an escapist fantasy, but it is called a work of fiction for a reason. Sure, we may want sex to involve great music and lighting, and all that ‘perfect setting’, but we can’t forget to distance fiction from reality. And the reality is, sex is never like it is portrayed on the magazines, in books, and on the screens. It is different for every two people, and will involve emotions, experiences and settings that can’t be aptly captured by a movie.
Myth: You can’t get pregnant the first time you do it
I’m sure you have heard this, or even weirder ones for that matter (doing it standing up, on your periods, and such). The truth, you can get pregnant regardless if it’s your first or nth time having sex. You can get pregnant even when you use a condom, or on birth control. The only 100% sure way to not get pregnant is to not have sex. If you choose to have sex, know what you are getting into.
Myth: Drugs and alcohol make sex much more fun
Under the influence of alcohol and drugs, sexual encounters seem like once in a lifetime opportunities that won’t be replicated again. But here’s the thing, alcohol impairs your sound decision making skills and judgment, making it possible to practice unsafe sex. Plus, substance abuse causes impotence, inability to orgasm, and other side-effects you probably want to avoid.
Being high or drunk will not make the experience any better or fun, it is more likely to make you regret in the morning for doing it under the influence.
Myth: Condoms keep you from enjoying sex
Many of us have probably heard this one. It is true, but up to a point though. Yes, condoms will reduce sensitivity for the guy, but not for the girl. Condoms will not completely eliminate feeling, and the advantages of having a condom on far outweigh not having one. The condom market has grown in variety over the years, so it is worth experimenting to find out which you are comfortable in.
Myth: Having oral sex will not make you pregnant
Well, this one is true. For a girl to get pregnant, the sperm has to fertilize her eggs, which are located in the uterus (generalizing here), and there is no way to get there through the digestive system. So, a girl can’t get pregnant if she swallows sperm. However, she can contract STIs such as gonorrhea and herpes this way. If you want to indulge in safe oral sex, use a condom on a penis, and a dam (soft plastic sheet that acts as a barrier) over the female genitalia.
Myth: A guy’s testicles will explode if they get worked up and don’t have sex
This is a time honored sex myth, and something your older sister or mom will attest to have heard before. It is true that guys will experience some kind of discomfort from having the muscles tensed due to arousal, but it won’t result in any ‘exploding’. Just like dull aches fade away, that uncomfortable feeling goes away in time. ‘Blue balls’, as they are commonly referred to, won’t kill anyone, and are definitely not a reason to go on and have sex with a guy for.
Myth: Guys pressure girls for sex all the time.
This is generalization more than anything else, and has caused a lot of trouble. See, everyone’s different, and so are any combination of two. Pressure can come from either party, regardless of their age or experience.
Myth: Fooling around with sex is like leaving the movie theatre before the ending
The fact is, nobody will grade you for not going through with sex. One thing people should realize is that sex is a choice, and not a must. Fooling around depends on the parties involved, and what they are comfortable with. If it is not the right time, don’t do it. Simple as that.
Myth: Having sex makes you an adult, more mature
Another popular myth out there. Just because you had sex doesn’t automatically make you an adult. Maturity entails a lot more than just sexual experience. Adults don’t engage in acts just for the sake of getting them over with. Being an adult is a process, takes time, and focuses on developing as a person.
Myth: If you love each other truly, then you should have sex
Being in love and being ready to have sex are two very different animals. If you truly love someone, then try to find other ways to express that love until you are both truly ready. If your partner is pressuring you to take that step, and possibly threatening to leave you if you don’t acquiesce, it goes to show how they truly feel about you. If someone truly loves you, they will be willing to trust, respect and wait for you.
Myth: Sex education encourages promiscuity in young people
Sex education helps to open up minds to the perils of having unprotected sex, and being ignorant of useful information. Lack of information fuels curiosity and experimentation, which often leads to bad results and experiences.
There you have it, some of the common myths debunked. If you feel that something about sex is not right, or feels exaggerated, consult sex health services, or do your research and get the proper facts. It helps to have the right information, and most of all, don’t believe everything