Be it friends, family, work or health, we’ve all experienced worry in some form or the other. While saying the words “Everything will be okay” is often used as a quick mechanism to take your mind off things, the problem still continues to persist and we all know that. So what is the solution for worries? The answer often lies in attitude. Your worry can be quite different from your colleague’s or at times can be the exact same thing. And don’t we all find ourselves saying that he or she somehow must have an easy way out because the effects of the problem don’t seem to bother them as much. But is that so? Every person is different in dealing with problems and worries, and sometimes the answer can lie in the way you look at things. Perspective can change a lot more than you think.
In our quest for the big things of life, which entails huge risks and chances, the cause of worries cannot be found very easily. Very few people stop to enjoy the very simple pleasures of life. While the cause of worry won’t resolve itself within 24 hours, the very act of worrying about it can be simplified. Here are a few tips:
Living in the Moment: It is often said that “Today is the tomorrow we worried about yesterday.” In retrospect, things we worry about are so trivial, they cease to matter within a day or two. Scientifically, it has been concluded that on a typical evening, we’ve already forgotten 40% of what happened to us the previous day. The key to living a worry free life is living in the moment. And by living in the moment, we do not mean making every second count, but only understanding that what we have today cannot be found in the same form tomorrow. No matter what your worry, it is important to appreciate the people and situations we have in life without taking them for granted. Missing a get-together with family because you have a huge presentation coming up is never the way out. On an average, every second you spend worrying about a problem takes your mind off things which could actually be multiplying your happiness.
The idea is to start appreciating what we have today and live with those things knowing that no problem remains unresolved very long. “Today is all we have” might sound like a cliché, but it is true. We can’t predict the future or change the past. And while the solution to a problem might not be what you expected or even satisfactory, but it will materialize. That’s what counts in the long run.
Spend Time with Yourself: No matter how busy you are with work, spending time on yourself is extremely important. The reason why a lot of worry gets alleviated is because we are in the company of people that keep reminding us of the task at hand a lot more, than when we are by ourselves. Start taking out atleast one hour in your day for yourself and doing what gives you satisfaction. It could be playing with the dog, or reading a good book in the comfort of your room. Keeping ourselves occupied doing things we like is an excellent way to appreciate the fact that despite the worries that may exist, the things we hold most dear and enjoy haven’t gone away. It is only upto us to find time for those things.
Some people find happiness is spending time with another person who is dear to them, a grandparent, child or friend. Spending time with ourselves does not mean being alone. Simply talking to a grandparent about your day can be a very calming experience, and very rewarding for the relationship. Try it.
Worry is natural, accept it: We often assume that our habit of worrying over trivial details is something is unique to us only, which complicates matters. Thinking, or over thinking your habit of worrying is adding more baggage on your mind. Everyone worries and that is a fact. Worry at an initial level can help us identify what is important to us and what deserves our attention. It serves to tell others what is important to us and what makes us feel special. Worry is not bad as long as it serves these functions. But prolonged worry over the same things, which is a direct product of thinking about a problem is unhealthy and damaging. Accepting your problem is the first step to reducing the amount you worry about it. Knowing that the solution exists, only it’s not showing itself yet is the next. And when the solution does exist, taking action towards it immediately and then letting go of it is the final step. Nothing is permanent, and no matter how influential a particular event or situation might have been, it will pass.
Don’t ignore the bad stimuli, but keep the good ones close: Finding bad things to worry about can be damaging because we forcefully look for reasons to be worried. However, again, it is important to not shut ourselves out from these also. They exist and accept them, but taking on worries from other people and being out there to solve everyone’s problems never did anyone any good. Switching off the radio to avoid the coverage of an accident is permissible, but only a form of escape at the end of the day. Escape isn’t the way out, but keeping good things close to us is. Finding the things we are grateful about and reminding ourselves is an excellent way of keeping bad thoughts at bay. The hurricane might come, but it’s important to appreciate the haystack right now. There are tons of things in our life we love, and following a simple exercise of taking out time to express your gratitude for them can work wonders on your worrying mind.
Take a Walk: Or do something that keeps positive and well in the moment. While living in the moment is about appreciating today, it takes a lot more than just the thought. Attitude counts for so much, but action is where the effort lies. Taking a walk in the woods to take in the beauty of nature and pay attention to the various colors and sounds can calm and energize you. This is where knowing the simple pleasures of life counts. Baking a cake, and watching it get a perfect color and bake can be vastly satisfying. Volunteering at an NGO is another way. Finding what gets you going and gives you satisfaction is an important exercise. We all have mostly one life to live, and the way we engage and occupy ourselves with the people in it will not only make our worries seem less important, it will extend our positivity in everything we do.